I have ONE question for you. It's about the woman you met. Is this sudden decision to let your W go less about your W, and more to do with wanting to move on with someone else?
If your decision is coming from a desire to be with someone else, it's not a good decision, Ripe. It makes sense, absolutely, but you're not even D yet. You have no real business asking someone new out when you're still involved with your wife.
I hope I'm not sounding too harsh. I completely support your decision to cut W loose. It makes a lot of sense. It's just that you haven't been able to do that, yet. Suddenly, you meet someone you'd like to date, and you're ready to let her go?
My worry is that you're detaching for the wrong reasons. It's best to be divorced for a while. Be still with yourself for a time, and then move on. It's not fair to a new person in a R to get tangled up with someone who is still in another R. You run the serious risk of hurting an innocent party if you begin moving on before you're truly ready.
This whole business? Awful. Lonely. Heartbreaking. The situation demands healing before you can really move on. I think you're part of the way there. But all the way? No, you're not.
The desire to be close to another human is natural. You are getting no judgement from me on that. I completely understand. A rebound relationship is always a mistake. I think you might be setting yourself up to head in that direction.
Please give this some thought, and let me know what you think?
