New Year..Need new goals

[25yearsmlc]

I feel so alone.

You are NOT alone. This would be a lie to say you are alone. We are here.

I will never understand this. I agree. And since you won't ever understand it, you can Stop trying to understand and stop asking him WHY he is doing/saying/planning one thing and yet also doing X or Y.

Not your business and besides, you won't understand it. It's not about you either. Just lt go or it


.

Never in a million years. We were meant to raise our family together.
To spoil our grand children. To grow old together.

Where did you read that you "were meant to raise our family together", etc? It's news to me. THE reality is he never married you and was never the man you believed he would become...b/c as is, he's not really marriage material, is he.?

I mean, it is nice & it's quaint to say those things, but it's what couples decide, together. I get the feeling you are not on the same page, LET ALONE a page that determines what you were each "meant to do"...it's harder when our partners begin to stray or look as it one can only track a few,,,
'


He's sitting pretty and I'm left to pick up the pieces. Yeah that seems fair.


No one said what happens here, is fair. We make the best of the cards we are dealt.
Besides, I would genuinely detest being in his shoes. What shame he will someday feel. AND If he feels none, it just means he's not capable of deep love, & the sooner you flee, the better for all.

You are AGAIN^^ mind reading with him big time, to your detriment AND ignoring the fact that he's not with his kids and YOU ARE. ((If I could choose who to be in this scenario, it would be YOU)--the empowered one.

"Picking up the pieces" means to me, bonding with my children as much as best I can..crezting a sum or parts, better than before.

& it might be something to thank the ex for someday. He will miss out on so much and there will be less LESS tension in the home, and you shape the children you are raising...YES you're probably very lucky I think

And I bet you've got this!!