I am sure my wife won't leave her job but she may switch shifts.

I kinda have a plan in mind. We have talked about what reconciliation would take. Dating for a bit. No contact with om. Transparency. Counciling. But I really have no plan for the current situation other than to go live life and if she calls she calls. I don't plan on calling her and avoiding her when she drops off the kids.their grandma can do the exchange. So I would be open to hear your advice.

Really since the first week I haven't talked to her much other than a few things about the kids. She's asked for a hug a few times. She has tried manipulating a few times with the kids.. Right now I won't let my life their daughter see her because I feel it's too confusing. My ww is neither cold or angry. She blameshiffted to her friends that know of the affair but that's it. We're cordial when I was doing the kid switch and I tried to act indifferent to her. She hasn't asked for a divorce and I am not pushing for one. We live in Nevada and it can be over in 10 days

Not sure what you mean about boundaries though. I mean not sleeping with another man was one but she's broken that. My young boys are around this guy and I can't really stop it although I have asked her to stop. I am not sure how far I go with this. I am 43 tall handsome guy. Been hitting the gym and lost 20lbs. I will find another woman when I am ready. I want to save this marriage but the longer I wait the more I feel like Plan B to her. Or the more I read on here it all seems like it will be so hard and such a game to move past all this.

I feel like I can forgive. I am not sure if that will change if she tries to come back.
I want to be the Lighthouse for her but also am scared to have to go through this all again or even trying to work it out and it fail.

In some ways I feel bad for her that she has gotten herself into such a predicament. Now she's paying for a house she rented and all the bills and raising two boys. No family really. And not a lot of friends and interests. We were her family and interests.

I am just confused. I miss her and our family but is it time to clear the slate and start over with someone else. What if she comes back then? I wanted to give her 6 months but really. If she can't decide in 30 days I may file and just move on