I agree completely with you, Mona. The main reason I don't want to live with my mom is the fact she lives 3 hours away from here. I also smell H control by dictating to me where I can go. I think I'm starting to feel a few faint stirrings of anger now. Is Vanilla clairvoyant?
I've been controlled long enough, thank you. I'm breaking it down into smaller steps. I've identified what I need to do, and I'm working on it a bit at a time. That's really helping to keep me from feeling overwhelmed. I have a feeling that doors will start to open now. I just need to be open to receiving, and I wasn't when I was determined to stay here and keep H from mucking up his life along with everyone else's.
I think I'm making progress, finally. Real, true progress!
I won't overdo it on the exercise. I promise. Besides, when I try to...heart lets me know bad idea. It's really scary, so I obey. It's so freaking cold outside! I'm a walker, and it is the last thing I want to do because of the cold. I used to say (before I knew what cold was, growing up in South Texas) that I would rather be cold than hot. Hah!
The first time I experienced temperatures below zero, as an adult, I changed my mind in a hurry! I remember the ache all the way down to my bones. Too much heat? I get sleepy, sick. Too much cold? Oh! The agony!
In south Texas, cold would mean we might get icicles on the water fountains one night out of a year. Snow? Only saw it on a movie. Seriously. No idea what cold really was.
