Since you have that L, let her do all the negotiating with your H's attorney. She's your agent. By virtue of the issues, every D winds up in court. I had a mediated D (no attorneys) and we still had a court date. It wasn't fun, but it was a necessary conclusion so that I could go forward.
You're going to have to train yourself to see your situation differently. It will take time, but like exercise, it gets easier to absorb. I know you're mad that you have to finish it. But look at it this way, you're doing what any healthy person does to protect their self interests. I think it would speak volumes if you were to tell yourself that you deserved this and to let him call all the shots.
Good luck with the living situation. I think our generation is so programmed to feel that renting is throwing away good money. I did a pro/con list several years ago and found out that repairs/insurance/upkeep negated much of the benefits of owning. The only way that wasn't true was if I was living mortgage free. There's something to be said about letting someone else take care of the handyman stuff. Plugged sink? Call management. Leaky faucet? Call management. I think it's a great way to negotiate life for a spell. BTW, I'm moving this week myself. Not very fun. But I'm embracing the necessary change in 2016. I want a much more carefree lifestyle - no more home maintenance, roof replacement, painting, landscaping issues or shoveling snow. I'm done with that part of my life!
Great goal list! One of mine this year is to take some wood working classes. I want to learn how to do the stuff I would have learned how to do if my mom let me take shop in high school like I wanted. LOL. I did learn how to sew in home ec, though, and I can't be mad at her for that. It's come in handy more than a few times.
Make 2016 the year of Becky. Any actions, thoughts, desires must be supportive of Becky's wish list. It helps make things a little more clear. When in doubt, ask yourself, "Will this bring me closer to my goal?" If not, you have your answer.
Good luck! Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
