I live in a smaller town. 1000 people so there isn't a whole lot to do in the evenings. However tonight there is adult volleyball that she had always wanted to go to and I never did. We went once early on in the split and I plan on going alone tonight. I did mention that I was going and she was welcome to come if she wanted. But I going. Also there is a gym opening soon so I plan on getting out to work on myself and meet people there. If I'm not alone there.
Good. Can you do stuff with your kids too? Is there a parent group you can join? Im not sure how far away from a bigger town you are; maybe check out meetup.com? Also, the local libraries usually have stuff thats cheap or free for kids.
Originally Posted By: Tyler12
I do feel like heading to the basemt is an attempt to avoid her.
Right and if she can sense this, then she will know that your activities and such are about her and not about you. What youre doing is good; but how to frame your mindset such that you want to be doing X, not just that you want to be avoiding her?
Originally Posted By: Tyler12
Being winter and cold and dark my outside options are a bit limited and sitting upstairs is to sit on my phone and watch her texting and talikng to friends and OM.
No. Nobody wants this.
Quote:
Tyler12]she wanted me to be more outgoing and do stuff and now she sits on her phone constantly. I also fear that if we engage in conversation I am going to get sucked back into being totally available to her. Right now her emotional needs are being primarily be OM and I picking up anything he isn't. I want to stop that it's my fair to me to be strung along and feel like things are ok. Because they aren't and I need to work on me.
Agreed. So dont get sucked in. Dont meet her emotional needs. She already fired you. Let OM meet all of her needs. I think it was CaliGuy that said to let OM handle the entire train behind the engine; not just the front car.
