At the very least - turn off your phone from like 11pm to whenever you get up so that he can't upset you in the night trying to make you responsible for everything.
He's saying all that stuff because of the OW. It makes her feel bad. It's not apparent the kids won't ever like her and that's your fault. The OW is making your husband feel bad about it so he takes out his anger and frustration on you....because it makes the OW feel more secure in their relationship when he does that.
I just said this on another thread. You tell the truth. To him. To your kids. To anyone that asks. If he wants to lie, that's on him and his responsibility. Also, his relationship with his adult children is not yours to manage or control. That includes not lying to them on his behalf.
The internet is 90% complaining and entitlement and I hate it because I deserve better!
