I feel lost too. Nothing seems to change. But my H is also in a new relationship.
I'm so sorry Gmum, that must be even tougher to take.
[quote-Gmum]I'm slowly realizing that I can't control him or them, so I have been moving my focus back to myself. What can I do for myself. And I'm slowly finding pleasure in the things that before reminded so much of my H that I thought I could never do them again. There is a life after DB and you and I will both get there. Eventually. [/quote]
Yes, and that is why this is all so scary. Our Hs who would generally be agreeable are no longer prepared to do anything agreeable and are in complete control over what happens to our Ms, children and ourselves. Having no choices is a frightening thing.
[quote-Gmum]That said, I can't believe your H told your kids nothing much would change as he would still see them all the time. Mine also doesn't quite seem to grasp how much a divorce affects children. And he's even shipping os off overseas. His own mother even told me that he will pay the price for that one day.[/quote]
No, I know. My H is completely burying his head in the sand as to how much this is affecting the kids and hurting them. He has actually even got angry with S when S was sobbing and upset about it and told him to stop playing up! I honestly do not know how anyone consciously does it to their children. I'm sorry, I know this isn't very DBing as we are supposed to be all compassion towards our WAS but I do not see how someone can be OK enough to be loving towards me and kissing me on the forehead when he asks a simple question about if I want a drink one weekend and then the following weekend be so unhappy about life with me that he can do this to his children. These thoughts and questions haunt me continually.
Originally Posted By: Gmum
You are not alone. I'm here and I'm thinking about you!
Thank you so much Gmum, it is so comforting to know I can come here and talk to people who know how it feels.
