WAW - Detaching is the Hardest Thing

[SciDad]

Did you find anything while you were snooping (either this time or any previous sessions)?

If yes, she has no right to be upset. My wife got angry when she realized I'd been snooping, but I simply said she didn't have a right because I found out SHE was the one that couldn't be trusted. I then followed up by saying that if I hadn't found anything I'd be the bad guy, but since I found incriminating info, I was in the clear.

When I noticed her starting to hide her phone again I called her on it and asked for a transparency plan. We now have an agreement that I can look whenever I want, but that I'll let her know when I do it. She wasn't happy about it, but I was adamant that she needed to EARN MY TRUST. Along those lines, can you frame it around a your lack of trust?Meaning that you were hoping you would't find anything, but felt compelled to look anyway? It might be a bridge to get a transparency plan in place