I don't have the time to answer as much as I would like. I have so many comments about what you wrote in the last half of the last thread.
I think you need to back off W. You are pressuring her. Limbo [censored] but the uncertainty that accompanies it is hopeful. As long as there is uncertainty it is not over. Put too much pressure on and she will become certain but certain she wants out.
You cannot R with W whilst she is as she is. So use this time for you. Refocus on you.
From what you said she is angry and resentful about your behavior over 15 years. This is in the past.You cannot change it and you are changing you. She will have to work through that on her own.but it is good she is not saying that you are an A££hole. Maybe she does not believe you are now. Again keep working on improving YOU.
You intervened in a lousy situation.You stopped it and dealt with the aftermath with kids. Learn the lesson and move on.
I don't think your M is hopeless, but the path will be long. You have time so you can afford to stop focusing on it and W. Easy to say but still good advice.
R 25 years M 14 years S11 & S13 Working on it alone since Oct 2014 M in trouble a lot earlier (~2 years) Feb 2016. 1st R chat in a yr. Next R chat Aug'17 Still together
