Stay true to who you are. You are a fine woman. Your H reminds me so much of mine. Whatever demon is driving them is causing them to destroy their lives in a way that is absolutely heartbreaking. Be the strong one.
Great advice! Your two hubbies are making jokes of their lives. You can't let them make a joke of yours. You ladies have so much worth. I've read all your posts. You're good people. You're being pulled into dark places by people who, at this moment, don't deserve you. I know. I lived in that dark place for almost two years. She was just going to leave me there to whither and die while she had her jollies. I had to save myself.
You have to save yourselves. Your idiot-man children husbands won't save you right now. They're being selfish childish jackasses.
All I can share is my own experience. When I was a solid plan B for her she continued to treat me like a doormat. When I found my confidence and started truly moving on from her, it snapped her out of it. That's all I know.
Tx, Anc, Julie. Thank you so much. I REALLY needed to read/hear from you guys tonight as I just got text from H demanding I sign papers this week and how awful I was for taking "his" kids away at Christmas. He also left an angry voicemail. It really made me feel awful. Like I had done something horrible. He also has texted each kid demanding they thank him for the gift he left them (when he broke in). Yet he has made no effort to see them in the week we have been home. He really has villified me.
Sorry to hear that your H has thrown a tantrum. WAH tend to do that when they don't get their way. I think it is meant to guilt you into feeling bad and bring you down to his level. I am sure your changing the locks has made him feel like he has done something wrong. My H pulled that when I kicked him out because if A in house. He was/is adamandant he was doing nothing wrong and had every reason to justify A. My kicking him out made him look like he was doing something wrong, so he threw a tantrum and said it was the last straw in our M. Yeah, right, that was the last straw?!
Just keep going about doing what is best for you and kids. He will get over it.
Happy New Year!!
Me: 42 H: 40 M: 12 H moved out - 8/2015 I filed - 8/2015
Need some advice Son just texted H angry at him swearing etc that he ruined family by having an EA with coworker. S had just watched an emotional movie and was feeling low. Anyway H forwarded text to me asking where "our" son would have got this info. He is living with this woman and still will not admit that anything was going on before two months ago. Again he is making me feel like I have made grievous mistakes by talking to my kids about the truth. Should I have never told them anything?
The situation was going to be known in the family sooner or later. If what you said was true and not done in the spirit of manipulation, I think it's okay. I have spoken to my 23 year old daughter about my marriage. The truth is the truth. Your son is an human being with his own mind and opinions. I think this is between father and son. Your husband will have a hard time successfully defending himself and maybe forced to look honestly at what he's doing.
