I'm in a similar situation, and I know the choices on how to respond are tough and confusing. My partner is having an A, but can't quite let me go. We have the relationship talks, then the it's over talk, then the if only I had never let her in, and I wish I could let her go, but I can't talk. And meantime, I'm packing to leave but I have nowhere to go. So I'm in no hurry to get out because so many say it's better to be in close proximity to show her I'm so great, while others say detach, GAL, go dark, etc. I guess I can do both while we continue to interact (she's staying with a friend and I'm in the house that she owns...) but letting go and moving out and maybe across the country is just so drastic and risky. So I would say that theoretically these methods make sense, but that doesn't make it easy to put them into practice.
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat