Here again after 9 years and struggling

[ciluzen]

Thanks Rouky, Gmum and NYGal. I saw it as a good sign too but just don't dare to hope. I still can't really believe he sent it. He came round for literally 5 minutes this afternoon on his way to work. All he did was tell kids he would see them tomorrow and then stood awkwardly in the kitchen as I was emptying the dishwasher. Eventually he said that someone at work's relative has terminal cancer (his Mum died of cancer in February). I just acknowledged that it is awful and then he left for work. He can't even look me in the eyes when he says goodbye. Guilt I guess. So strange to act like that after texting happy new year only a few hours earlier.

I agree with the others; it does seem to be a good sign that he is still thinking of you. He is probably very undecided on his feelings. You are doing very well, better than I am, at staying aloof and detached,even though you are sharing your pain and thoughts with us. You can do this! He seems to be really rather mixed up, but missing you?

I think my H is more leaning out, and him having the support of long time friends will make DB almost ineffective. Your H, on the other hand, seems to be leaning in. Keep Doing what you are doing, it seems to be having an effect.