D and I went to the park - coooooold! H texted about some activities he wants to do with D tomorrow and said I could come to. I said I would like to see her do those things, so yes. Then we ran into him on the way home from the park. Now she's chilling in front of the tv - yes, I know, but I am so tired. Stayed up way too late.
I am having a hard day. It is my DB anniversary and my wife just left. Our friends are having an afternoon get together and she went without me. I asked if I could go with and she said no. Later when I explained that it was hard for me with her going alone she said I was being selfish by telling her and I should stop. Do you think she was correct? Was it selfish to bring it up?
I don't think it was selfish, but probably not very good DB'ing. She'll just see you as a wounded puppy dog and that's not very attractive. Can you go do something fun for yourself? Make sure you're out of the house when she gets back.
I'm sorry today is rough on you. Could you go watch a movie and have dinner with a friend? Anything to bring a smile to your face.
Thank you Gmum. I guess I was selfish because I dropped a couple hints before that moment. I am hanging out with my daughter, both surfing the web while watching a hockey game she put on the tv.
There are just those hard moments, very hard moments when you feel like discarded trash.
Trust me, I know exactly what you mean. And it's not just me, I don't understand how H can be ok living on a different continent than his preschool aged D. I know he loves her more than anything, but I guess his own happiness and the OW came first in this instance.
It's nice you get to hang out with your D. Maybe you could take her out for dinner and a movie when the hockey game is over.
My wife set up the crock pot, rice cooker and bread machine to all be ready at 6pm. Eat and cleanup is all we have to do.
My heart sinks when I think about your husband leaving your D for his selfish needs. What could be better then helping your D evolve and grow into adulthood. All those precious moments lost! What a foolish choice to make. I don't mean any disrespect Gmum but it is foolish.
He's so used to traveling and being away that even though he says he doesn't like it, he does nothing to change it. The plan is he will spend about one week a month overseas, so he will see her on a regular basis.
I wish I didn't have to think of anything for dinner. Will have to be something extremely easy today.
Mutatio, I am sorry. All I can suggest is that you work on dropping that rope. I dropped it finally right before Christmas and just 5 minutes ago H came in and asked me if I wanted to go to the mall with him and his mother and I almost yelled "NO WAY!" If that offer had been extended to me just 2 weeks ago I'd be out the door in one second flat and I hate the mall. Ironically, as everyone here says, as soon as I dropped the rope he suddenly is hovering a bit more, and extending more invitations. Try it. It's not a magic pill, I am still depressed as heck, but H's comings and goings are a lot easier on me. Also, ironically, I don't WANT him to hover. The invitations are nice though.
Is your son home? Maybe take him to the movies or something fun. Or go on that hike I told you about!
I'm trying, it's just hard with my DB anniversary and the conversation we had yesterday. Dropping the rope is my goal. I doubt that my wife will not even notice that I dropped the rope but I will try.
11/4/15 W revealed EA/2 months later became PA with co-worker Reconciling since late April 2016 Don't give up until it's time, then move on Be patient, strong and kind but never a doormat
