Time to make changes

[joss]

Thanks kml for your roadmap. We are nowhere near that point. I think my H just wants to remain friends with me.

The correspondence I get from him simply tell me that he is sad for the way things turned out for us. There is no sense of him having understood that his affair caused the problem in our marriage.

Naturally, I am unable to remain his friend under these circumstances; friends don't hurt each other like that, and they certainly aren't secretive and deceptive with each other.

I think you will know if he is serious or he just wants to keep his foot in the door
It will take a lot for him to really turn his life around at this point

In my situation, I don't feel he's trying to keep his foot in the door, peacetoday. I think he has just resigned himself to the fact that our marriage is over (due to our 'growing apart' over the years (not mentioning his affair, of course)) and he is now focussing on a new life without me (hense the dating sites). He sends me emails/texts on 'special days' to say he's thinking of what we had, but not that he wants a renewed relationship with me.


Regarding 'turning his life around'. I do think he is heading in that direction. He seems to be putting a lot of effort into setting up his own business (which he's wanted for about 10 years) so that is definately a positive for him.

123Gwen thanks for your kind words. I am trying to put my family centre stage. They are the only ones that matter now.

Regarding my wedding addiversary: I've just had a text from h saying "Another sad day. I hope you are OK". So this just confirms what I said above about him recognising special days and saying how sad it all is. Nothing more, Nothing less.

thanks for listening, kind friends. x