Focus on my own life

[Sotto]

Hi Focus, I'm sorry to hear that Sweetie. TBH, it doesn't sound as though MIL is thrilled about the current state of affairs either. I think what is going on is this - your H is bouncing into a new entanglement as a way of dealing with his own pain.

It is hard to hear that our spouse has become involved with someone else. And easy for our mind to start racing - who is she, what is happening and so on. But truly, in the wider scheme of your sitch it makes little difference. They may just go out for a few weeks. It may last a little longer - who knows?

The important thing is that your M ended at BD and will remain ended until he expresses willingness to be part of the M again, and do whatever is needed to repair things.

Good for you walking into work. You did well to channel the difficult feelings into your walking and not to react to MIL or to him. I think when you get to a point that you can sit with the pain and process it all without reacting, you are making progress. I'm not saying any of that is easy, or feels nice - but if you are able to do it, that is a positive thing.

For now, accept the feelings of shock, anger and pain - accept whatever you feel. Post here and vent, talk to your IC if you have one. But know that this is just a point in time, and we don't know how things will ultimately play out. Only time will tell and it is always your choice if you choose to stand for your marriage and how long for.

My very best wishes to you and take care xx