Updated/still thinking about next steps

[Zues126]

Kyrie, I'm here, I've been reading and thinking about your sitch, I just haven't had much to offer. It's so tough, all I can do is empathize and give you some support.

For what it's worth, I was probably worse than your H in my marriage. I knew I had problems, but thought the biggest issues were XW's. I remember thinking it was on her to bridge the problems in our M since the problems were hers, and using negative behavior as if I was trying to play 'hotter/colder' with her being the one trying to find something and me giving her clues as to which way to go. Not sure where I got the idea that was how a marriage worked

The good news in those words are that it means that just because your H is behaving this way doesn't mean he wouldn't ever be a viable partner. The bad news is that doesn't help you now as you have a hard road ahead.

I'll keep reading if you keep posting. Hopefully some vets chime in soon as well. JB and I are mostly here for moral support.