Cali babe, Job is right: until someone walks a mile in your shoes, they'd best stfu. Only you will know when it's time to walk away, if that time ever comes. From what I've heard from others, that moment, if it happens, is crystal clear.
Just my thought as I have been wondering the same thing a lot since 12/25's "Hijinks with Hubby" when I realized how completely the relationships with extended family have been damaged by his leaving. My parents ... God love 'em, they're devastated. I too feel like I'm crazy to contemplate standing for a marriage when I haven't really been given any clear sign that there's any reason to stand. I will tell you what I tell myself on my good days: I did not get married to get divorced. The world does not need another middle aged Divorcee. There is more good in this relationship than bad, even given the complete BS of the past 8 months. Marriage is a sacrament: it is how we learn to love God through true intimacy with one other person. You know this, as you are also Catholic. There is a boy (my 16year old) watching all of this unfold. It is going to have a profound affect on how he views love, marriage, relationships and intimacy for the rest of his life. I need to make sure I'm a power of example for this child. He deserves parents who gave it their best shot.
Like you, I cannot explain it, there is just this deep feeling within me, underneath all the fear, that there's more to do here. It's not time to take my ring off yet. It's not time to walk away.
Does any of that make sense?
Someday, maybe you can share your STFU Smoothie recipe. I need to drink more of them, for sure. I don't think I could live with my MLCer right now. S tells me from time to time how snappish he is on phone with his employees. Sounds dreadful. His constant tension, seething anger ... no, I don't miss that and frankly am relieved not to have to live with it.
Regarding wife's PMS ... you mentioned something about diet and her going a holistic route. Is she working with someone, an integrative md or a reputable experienced herbalist? There are many things she could do to help with the hormones. I'm unclear if you're saying things got worse when she went that route or better?
M 20+ T25+ S ~15.5 (BD) BD 4/6/15 D 12/23/16
"Someone I loved once gave me A box full of darkness. It took me years to understand, That this too, was a gift." ~ Mary Oliver
