I don't know if you have come across Vanilla (V or Lady V). V is a warm, gentle, intelligentand special woman, who when I first arrived here soothed my rather tortured and devastated soul. I too talked about limbo and here is what she wrote to me
"So Limbo you mentioned that earlier in a post. Limbo is a holding place for innocents who have died without knowing their higher power, new borns for example. it is a good place of care and calm befitting innocents, a safe place. Innocents who need gentleness because of their lack of knowing." Vanilla
I guess this description lends itself to inspired action. I don't know what it is for other's, but inspired action has occurred for me, when I have let go of the outcome I want, and let go and let God or my high power lead me to the outcome I need. In my life it has occurred when everything that is needed for change (the circumstance, the right people, the right amount of money) have all come together at the right time. Everything aligns and decisions to take action come with ease.
You will read inspired actions on here. An opportunity where a someone has been able to say the right thing to their spouse at the right time in the right way. All their personal work came together in one moment to allow them freedom. The person is often not attached to the outcome of the moment, because they spoke their truth without fear of consequence.
You will read people making the decision to drop the rope or take an action that has previously been fraught with angst. If you read PigPen's thread. He is like the poster child for inspired action. He appears to be completely aligned to where he is supposed to be. If you read is threads you will see that inspired action is not necessarily about not feeling pain or indecision. It is however a path you are drawn to.
I feel the same about my own journey. I am exactly where I need to be.
If you are in limbo Kyrie, that would tell me that there is more preparation work that needs to be done. When you are ready to leave Limbo, you will know. It will feel like another hand or mommentum is moving you to a different place.
In the meantime, you are in Limbo, make the most of your time there. I found for myself that I could either fight it or I could make friends with it and make my time there useful. I decided that I wasn't going to go through all this pain and torture for nothing, there was going to be a reason for all of it. I guess what I discovered was the reason was ME.
I was the most precious outcome that I could and would have. My lesson through this awful bittersweet journey was my discovery of myself. When you are in Limbo, what you find is there is no one but you. You is all you have.
Sure having an amazing and present partner to share life with is a blessing, but it is just that a blessing, not a have too or an entitlement. But having me, myself and I well that is all you have.
At the moment you are looking around a seeing nothing there but H pulling away. But right there where you is this amazing person who will provide everything you need, if you just invite her into where you are in Limbo. And the really surprising thing to me, but obvious to everyone else around me, that the more you develop that relationship with her in this place of Limbo, the more likely you are to find a gorgeous partner who values you and loves you. Be that H or someone else.
I moved from Limbo and I now have what I call my Breathing Room. Here I am learning to live my life for me, to love me. This room can feel claustrophobic and small at times, but is safe, and comfortable. I am at the point of needing to renovate- a deck I think to let a little more of life in.
Kyrie, you feel you have been doing the work of saving your marriage for a year. And this a worthy a noble pursuit. I do however feel another question that would likely move you out of Limbo and closer to your end goal, could be What have you been doing to save yourself?
Kyrie, my story is very different to other's here - I can offer you a lot of love and support and my respect for you choosing to stand. There are however alot other posters here who have so much to offer you along this next part of your journey. Post on their threads and please keep posting.
