TxHubby, I think you do give good advice but I think there's something missing. While it's true most of that advice of not being the plan B and gain some of our mojo back is good, most of us aren't just here because our S decided to cheat. Many of us have issues that led up to thr breakdown of our M, issues we should be focusing on and fixing instead of dating. When we start talking to other women our emotional needs begin to be met and then there's no reason to do any mirror work because we convince ourselves the S was the problem.
You might have been strong enough to talk with other woman and develop only a friendship that doesnt lead to a relationship but not all of us are.
Truth is very few of us are ready for a new relationship and getting involved in one is just hurting the other person. Its also skipping any real change we could do that might avoid our next R from failing also. Sure, the S's actions are out of our control but that doesn't give us an excuse to ignore our own.
I definitely understand that. I usually don't comment on those type of threads. My experience is with MLC/temporary insanity/cheating spouse. I know what failed and I know what worked.
