My wife told me I should be going on dates....
yes. She told you that. Because she doesn't want to feel guilty for being the one to break up the marriage. If she knows you are out doing your thing with other women, then that guilt goes away. It gives her more head fuel to the fire that you are the bad guy in all of this. What if she told you to sign over all your money? Or that she wanted 100% custody of the kids? Would you agree just because she asked?

If she finds out, I'm not going to deny it. That's part of it, I had to accept that she may very well find out. What's the worst that can happen? She's going to have an affair and ask me to leave?
this is not a short term process. Of course, there's nothing that will happen right now, besides her yelling at you. But if you are upset that she is having an A of some kind....look at yourself and convince yourself that talking to girls on Tinder is different. In my mind, if you want to stay married, the only difference is the timing. But I think the concepts are identical.

I didn't answer your other question. My intentions. I just want to start the process of remembering what its like to be a man, and that I like women, and that its okay to be around women. To make friends. To remember what its like to talk a woman, and have her talk to me, and it not be angry or vindictive, or callous or anything else negative.
what about the girl? People don't sign up for Tinder just to have casual conversation with someone else for the other person's benefit. Ask yourself if what you are doing is being fair to the other woman.

I'm not trying to hook up, or make my wife jealous. I view it as dating, pre-k maybe? I don't know. I have no idea what's going to happen. I know I'm not in any condition for a relationship, and I don't want that. But I think spending time chatting, talking, and possible doing stuff with women will be good for me.
i don't know. I have a hard time buying it. As I've seen Cadet say, why start a new relationship until you are done with the old one? I think that there are many other ways to get comfortable talking to people rather than one on one with a woman on a dating app. But, that's just my opinion.

Originally Posted By: Azzork
- Are you still interested in saving your marriage?


I don't know. I mean, on the one hand, yes. But...not with the woman that I was married to before, and certainly not with the WW that I have currently. If she decides she wants to stay married to me then she has a lot of things that are going to have to change, just like I'm changing.
if you want to stay married to Mrs. Bfice, I don't see how this is helping you to achieve your goal.

I'm currently not the same man she was married to 2 1/2 months ago. And if me talking to women is a problem for her, well guess what, she should have thought about that beforehand.
ultimately, you can decide to do what you want. It sounds like you are taking this step as a way of "paying back" your W on some level (whether or not she ever knows or cares about it aside.). But it sounds like she hurt you and you are looking for someone else to help ease that pain. I don't think it's these other girls' job to do that for you. It's your job. But again,that's just my opinion.