Hey Maybell, just replying here to your post on Mozza's thread.
Yes, after the divorce I dated 3 different "hermits" (middle aged men who were Love Avoidant and had gotten really comfortable being single; we had great times when we were together, but they didn't really want to be a couple, or hear about any of the problems I was facing, or feel obligated in any way.) I think they felt comfortable because I knew they wouldn't ask anything of me, or want more than I could give.
I also dated a couple of guys who were much too young; again, knowing nothing could come of it made it feel safe.
Once I really felt ready for a relationship, I met current BF, who has been tremendously supportive, is present every day, and has no hermit/avoidant tendencies.
I'm glad for all those relationships, and I might not have recognized current BFs stellar qualities if I hadn't had those experiences.
It's important to make sure we're not just repeating old patterns without being aware.
