Men are less apt to admit openly to being depressed (which you are!) because they have not been socialized to talk out their fears, dreams etc with someone else (like women always do...we tell each other everything and that's how we support each other through life's crisises.)
I would suggest that you go see you personal physician and tell him what's going on in your life and that you'd like to try a low dosage (50 or 100mg) of Zoloft. You will be absolutely amazed at how that medication will smooth out the extremes of your emotions. You'll have a much better grasp on things while you muddle through this difficult time in your life.
It's perfectly acceptable to admit you need some help and to get it!
I think you will do just fine in the long run...you are way ahead of game already having 'owned' your share of the responsibility in the breakdown of your M.
