Mahhhty. I came to see how you were doing. I can tell that you're still struggling much. I've only read this page though, so I may be off. I hope you're searching for the source of your pain. Some people react rather "well" to a D and it (and IC) made me realize that it was first and foremost a trigger for something in me. In my case, as you may remember, it was a serious lack of confidence that I could find someone worthy to share my life (not just that of course). Once I started flirting and dating, I gained a little more confidence and realized that there was another life out there for me, different but perhaps just as good or better. If you're ready to start dating, I'll recommend to you the same book that I recommend to others because it helped me: "Models - Attract Women Through Honesty" by Mark Manson. It helped me to approach women and to deal better with my D.
