H looked after kids tonight when I went out (had a great night by the way!). As he left I told him see you on Saturday, then he said isn't possible for me to see the kids for the next 2 days. Then he said that I might have some issues with him but he added that it wouldn't be fair on the kids. I did STFU and told him that I'll have a think about it and will let him know.
Now I didn't tell him that if we were in this situation it was because of and I didn't tell him that the girls didn't deserve what is happening to them. TBH I felt tonight that he was putting the guilty trip on me as he knows that when I feel guilty I back down. He also added that I could go out while he sees his kids.
I'm being bluntly honest: he didn't bother about his eldest daughter's feeling about Xmas (she is now 16 and never spent one Xmas with us). In the Uk they got Boxing Day (26th Dec), so he can see the kids there. I'm honest I don't want to see him for Xmas Eve or Xmas Day. For me he lost the right to be part of this family when he started his affair and now living with OW. I feel by him not seeing the kids on those two days, he is getting a idea of what it is to lose his family.
I really need a third person points of view on this. I found out that with his ex-partner when they split up he stayed (24th/25th Dec) with her and their child, but it was the only time as we have been together 11 years and he never asked his ex to have his daughter around for Xmas.
