need some help and advice with validating, and being fair in general but at the same time I don't want to bend over backwards to meet the needs of a man who left us and refuses to accept responsibility or consequences for his action. I feel like I'm the one that does the grunt work with the kids. I deserve the special holiday time with them. My family has been the providers for close to 2 years. (In those 2 years, I have no idea where husbands money went). I am saying this because I know the argument that husband does all providing and ends up getting short ended and I agree with that, but not in my case.
I also do not want to be vindictive and unfair either.
On Christmas, we have family come over all day. Obviously, I want to be the one to open presents with them in morning. Out of town relatives come early and leave early. Official party starts at 1:30 and usually consists of about 5 hrs worth of eating and playing games etc.
Husband will have very small get together starting at 1 at his moms house. The cousins coming cannot go there any other time. And will be there for '1 or 2 hrs. They live about 40 min away.
Kids are not going to want to leave me. I explained in a post above. Any ideas? How do I talk to him... I want to say so badly. " you are the one who made this decision to leave". Or " did your divorced friends and supporters that advised this, all tell you about how difficult the holidays get?
Please help before I make this worse. Husband did talk about reconciling a month ago but has not really brought it up again except 1 x when we met at child support hearing
Me: 42 H: 43 Twins age 5 Physically Separated 7/2015
