Some newcomers think they need to stop loving their S in order to DB. You don't ever have to stop loving her. Some think they have to act cold in order to detach. You don't ever have to act cold, angry, uncaring, vindictive, etc.
Sandi, or anyone else, I would love it you could point me in a direction to learn about DBing, detaching, and doing it with love!!!
This is my biggest issue (I think).
And yes, I'm concerned also about how to act in the counseling session. we meet tomorrow night at 5:30 with the MC. I don't want to be negative, but I really just don't even feel like going. The one thing that I want to happen isn't going to happen. And I really don't feel like sitting in another session listening to my wife bash on me, or tell again how she only loves me like a brother.
So, I'm supposed to be trying to have a positive attitude, and have no expectations right?
I mean, right now I just keep thinking about how my W hasn't even bothered to call and check on me once during all of this. The only thing she has done that could be classified as working on the marriage is going to counseling. But that doesn't really count because its definitely not positive.
Anyway...I hope everyone has a good night. I'll be around some tomorrow.
Me:41 - LBH in apt W:39 - WW in home Kids:D(15), D(11), S(9) - custody % 58/42 M: 15 yrs - DoS: 10-11-15 (PA confirmed 2-12-16; WW dumped by AP 11-6-15; WW dated 7-8 men in Jan '16 via Match.com)
