Zues knows exactly what he is talking about and you are VERY lucky that he is sharing his wisdom with you. My life would be easier if I always listened to Zues. Read his posts and follow them 100%.
One of the best pieces of advice I have gotten on this forum is to make a plan, and then consult your plan and NOT your feelings. Your feelings will steer you wrong more often than not, make a plan. For yourself, for your family, for your marriage. Write it out, set goals, follow your plan. Based on the DB principles of course. Its in the book.
Also, I hope you have cut contact completely with your girl buddy, because speaking as a woman, that isn't cool. I know your wife "started it" and I know in your mind it was "nothing", but to a wife its a big deal. Cut contact if you haven't, apologize to w if you haven't, and leave your phone out to prove you have nothing to hide.
Please keep posting and you will find great advice here.
