Did you join the forum earlier this month? If so, you could still be on moderation, which takes a bit of time.

I'm sorry that you find yourself here, but I can assure you that we are a great group of posters who will support you and provide you w/excellent advice and comfort in the days ahead.

So, let's start by you telling us something about yourself. How long have you been married, can you give us the age of your spouse? I am going to "assume" that your wife is still living under the same roof w/you. How is she behaving?

Tell us something about yourself. How did you almost lose all of your tools? I'm not surprised that she's tossed out the mediation appointment to you. She's miserable and she wants you to be that way too. Many of them do this stuff around a holiday, special event, anniversary and birthday. I'm sorry she's done this but she's in the selfish mode right now and doesn't care about anyone else but herself.

I would suggest that you can be civil w/her during the visit to her step family's home. You don't have to be lovey dovey, just be civil. It's going to be tough not to be depressed and/or sad about this turn of events, but you've got to show some interest in the holiday for your children. If your step in-laws inquire about things, I'd be honest advise them that they would need to speak her. Since she's the one driving the divorce train, put it back on her to explain to them what she's doing.

Once you are home, then you can think about what comes next. For now, I'd suggest not addressing the mediation appointment and try to keep the focus on you and your children. Try to enjoy the time w/your children as it will be over soon and then the reality of what your wife wants to do will be out in the open and your children will come to realize that mom doesn't want to be married any longer.

Again, I am very sorry this happened to you. I had something very similar happen to me many, many years ago. I do understand where you are coming from.

Please continue to post.

Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to.
The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.