I'm not sure how far you have read back but this is a difficult one.
I don't think W is in an EA/PA - I know that it shouldn't matter as I have been sacked as a H but there are subtle differences between DBing a WW and a WAW.
She hasn't been disrespectful for many weeks until Saturday night when she was at her most vulnerable. She was very very drunk, highly emotional, grieving for her father, telling random female strangers in the toilets of the pub of her problems, etc etc. as near to a nervous breakdown as anyone can get. All day Sunday and into Monday she had an uncontrollable nervous twitch- her leg was shaking. She is unravelling - her words.
Child sex abuse by her father has been a huge hidden secret in her life - she mentioned it to me once 10+ years ago and then buried it.
If after her father dies, and another BD talk comes I will distance myself for sure.
I am much stronger, more confident in myself, know my own self worth, I am physically fit, GAL as much as possible, and have two fantastic sons. I am lucky.
In the meantime I intend to be a supportive rock in the most difficult days of her life, not to smother her, but to love from a distance , but be available. A rock is the wrong word, as a rock is cold and uncaring, I will be warm, kind, caring, thoughtful and loving from a distance. I am trying to be a man she will respect, and be attracted to.
If it gets chucked back in my face, I will make a stand at that point. Due to our circumstances (work) she will not leave the house and I certainly will not leave if she asks me to. That will leave her with the choice of going for D or in house limbo. Even if she files it would be 2 years in UK until D.
I know much of this flies in the face of Sandis WW thread and advice but it is also DBing, as I GAL, have done several 180s, and going to counselling, read a lot of self help material etc.
Please don't take this post as disrespecting your 2x4 post. All views keep it real.
Initially W showed the usual, disrespect, resentment and rebelliousness. All that had gone until her disrespect on Sat night.
There are very few threads with no EA/PA, Huddy is one.
Me49 W45 T15 M13 S11 S8 BD 11/15/11 & 3/27/12 Moved out 4/9/12 Moved back 4/23/12 W working on US 5/20/12 Now Piecing! May-Oct14 drifting Dec 14 W agrees to more QT BD Oct15 ILYBINILWY W filed 1/25/16
