She Wants Me to Leave 3rd Time .....EA or not EA?

[isittoolate]

Hi vise - thanks for stopping by and thanks for your thoughts.

I didnt do anything wrong but my timing sucked - as MWD said ' 'pick your fights'.
W exchanging numbers like that was a red rag to a bull - all my frustrations came out. Several times I tried to leave the room but she either blocked me or goaded me into staying - saying I was running away - which I would have done years ago. I decided to fight my corner.

I should have put her to bed and and brought it up again when she was sober.

Its in the past - cant change it.

Your advice about being there for W is great and reinforces what the IC said. Each day I use the phrase ' How can I help you today? What can I help you with? i dont ring,text or email her and let her come to me. She wants to work to keep busy.

I am doing the child minding/housework/grocery shopping/present wrapping etc at the moment. If I see her wake very early (a sign of distress) I will go downstairs and talk to her give her a shoulder rub - dont ask, just do it.

In the evening again shoulder rub/neck rub - she has lots of knots - and combing through her long hair with my fingers - I wonder whether her mom or dad did this as she closes her eyes and melts a little when i do it.

Its hard not to smother her as I just want to wrap her in my arms and hug her forever - I've never seen her in such pain.