Very typical behavior, i.e., one minute angry monster mode and the next being kind. You don't hate your h, but you do hate the behavior and it's understandable because he's acting out totally. Try to detach a bit more and not react to his behavior. I know it's difficult when they are under foot, but you have to find a way of looking at him as a teenager growing through his "growing pains". The less you respond/react to his behavior the better.
I'm very sorry you are having to deal w/this and I do hope that he'll settle down very soon.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
