in house S (5)

[vise82]

hey,

About the neighbor, It hurt me and really pushed my buttons. I don't know why she decided to wait till last night to visit him after all these months. I was so angery, I wanted to lock her out of the house. But I calmed down thinking anger is the response she wanted, So as a 180 I satyed calm and acted as if I was ok. Then out of despsiration like she had no reason to stay at home , I gave her a reason, at least for tonight by asking her to watch a movie with me.

With the holidays approaching, I am going to STFU about it. If she does watch a movie with me I will be nice about it. If she manages to find a reason to not be home tonight. I will not pressure her.

I say these things wanting to do the opposite. I want to get into it with her about the EA with the gay neighbor. Show her how wrong she is to go talk to him and not to me, to just leave her family just as I was putting the kids to bed , and not saying good night to her children.

I am venting on here. Better here that to my W.

I need to think about next time she asks me, I will say that I will never give you permission to visit with the man that you want to be with but cant because her likes men not women, but that doesn't stop you does it? The man that has pulled you away from this family we started together. The man that you run to avoiding the rough time in our marriage instead of working on it and making it better. The man that helps you keep your head in the sand and in the clouds. Stop asking me, my answer will always be no. This is your family, not him.

I see W is planning the dine around for the neighbors where you go around and eat a different course of a meal at a different house. There was some dates tossed around and he was not available. He said to just have it on that date with out him, W said no that date wont work then. Its going to be in January some time. A lot can happen from now till then but it will be an interesting night if he is there.