What about just driving around (even with the kids) looking at xmas lights and listening to xmas songs on the radio? Then going out for dinner? If she asks or I feel ballsy I'll use GB's suggestion - it certainly is true. It would also be nice to have family xmas time before the inlaws show up on Christmas day.

As for your possible D: STFU, STFU, STFU!

It is what it is and you are/were dealing with things that were so far from your fault. If you do end up getting divorced it's got absolutely nothing to do with anything you've said or done. And so you know, I actually think you're not in as bad a situation as you think. It's just a VERY complicated situation

Me-38 W-38; T-15 M-12;
S10 and S6
BD - July 2016; EA confirmed; confronted Aug 2015
EA dissolved 12/2016

Never make someone a priority when all you are to them is an option - Maya Angelou