Mona, You only validate/affirm when he actually does something. I know you are scratching your head right now about this...but there is going to come a time when he will do something right, offer to do something and possibly carry through. Just put this suggestion in your hip pocket and leave there until the time comes.
Just remember, his self esteem is at an all time low and you don't kick a person when they are completely down. Yes, he frustrates you and yes, you get angry...but the best way to deal w/him is kill him w/kindness.
Take that anger you have simmering and use it wisely. Use it to help you get up and do the walks that you need/want to do. Use it to bust on. You've got some goals for the new year and that anger will help you get there if you use it wisely.
This is my opinion, so take it w/a grain of salt, you need to learn how to love yourself first and be on your own. You've got to clear up some of those issues before seeking out a willing partner to help you figure out things. Your baggage needs to be lighter before getting involved w/someone else. Be up front w/the person and advise them you are going to enjoy their company, but you are currently unavailable for a R. Don't wait until they get too close.
Just my two cents.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
