My first thought when seeing all my threads posted here was YIKES! I am one sorry person! Then the other side of me said, "Well, there must be a reason you're here, so just chill out."
I'm sorry you have had to go back and revisit my threads. Sorry because if you feel a need to do that, I know this must not be sitting well with you.
Respect is a 2 way street. And although it is tempting to feel like the person who caused this all to happen, there is probably a good chance that he wasn't respectful of you either. Don't be tempted to figure that out, because you'll eventually figure out it's a chicken-egg scenario. Quite unhelpful.
I continually find new books that give me insight on me, him, and our dynamics. The most recent one I read has been extremely enlightening... it was recommended to me by another BB poster, called Wild at Heart by John Eldredge.
The book is about masculinity. And I felt really awful when I finished it. I might not have thrown the first stone at Mr. W. (or even the 2nd or 3rd), but I certainly had my fair share of potshots to add to the damage. I feel an awful lot of shame about it. However, I can only change how I act from here on out.
Happily, since the early days of our separation (we're nearing 16 months next week), I have worked on that very issue... and he's noticed it. It's not for naught, friend.
I'll happily recommend it to you because it's an eye opener.
Cheerio!
Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
