Your H is shakened by your pain which doesn't seem all that bad. He's not denying it, and he's not angry at you for showing him how you feel.
It seems that your H is also opening up to you by telling about his suicidal thoughts? If he is asking you to go to starbucks, he is initiating R talks, perhaps you can go along, if you feel like you're up to it, and see what's going to happen? Maybe instead of you talking, you could wait for him to talk?
My XH initiated quite a few R talks in the months leading up to the D, but eventually I tired of them because he was always so angry. On hindsight, I realised that was probably the only way he knew of reaching out to me, and that he probably had to vent his frustrations first. I should have tried harder at validating and being patient.
But this is just me talking...
hmmm... and what was the gift card for? Can it cover lash extensions?
You can call me Dory/ Grl.
As a wise fish once sang,"Just keep swimming!"
It's no use to go back to yesterday because I was a different person then.
