the journey is the reward

[Lyrael]

Slowly-
IMHO, to expect yourself to trust someone who doesn't deserve it right now is expecting a bit much of yourself. It has been no few months since my husband's A officially ended, but I still have the fear, and I really don't trust him yet. I am making baby steps in that direction, but I try to go easy on myself. I have a lot of perfectly normal feelings to overcome!

My H and had a huge fight around Christmas time because I asked him if he had been in touch at all with the OW. He said no, and I found a picture of them at his shop together taken a week before. The affair was still over, but I was really hurt that he lied.

So consider this before you insist on no contact...your H may not be ready to do that, and you insisting on it may only create a situation where your H feels backed into a corner and forced to lie. My suggestion is to leave it alone right now - don't mention it if you're able not to. Be the balanced person, and sometimes an OW will freak out and cling and become needy. That happened as well in my sitch.
Just my .02,
Myrrh