Zero steps forward

[Pax_luv]

To health and happiness.

This evening I had a dinner program with a bunch of physicians whom I work with. I've been working with a physician consultant to work on some communication skills amongst physicians- deep/ heavy communication skills- not just the basics. This has been an ongoing effort and I have learned so much for myself just by being a part of the sponsorship of the program. Truly, it has helped me immensely over the last 6 months. Anyway, tonights program was about difficult conversations and many of the physicians had to share their recent experiences- all very serious patient experiences and I just found myself so overwhelmed with emotion. So many people are going through situations far worse than myself... Their loved ones are dying tragic deaths, or worse, slow painful deaths. I heard of one woman who was inconsolable after learning her husband just had days to live- her crying out, "we were supposed to be together forever." Ugh- so painful. It really puts things in perspective... I feel foolish for feeling mopey for my sitch. At the end of the day, I don't have it bad AT ALL. Not in the least- I even consider myself lucky. Geez, time to make new gratitude reflections, Feyth.

With that, the consultant I work with is a well known physician (been on tv, etc) and she's pretty inspiring- very much a female warrior! She asked me about my plans for the holidays and we got into my marital status. She knew I was married, but stopped wearing my rings recently. She gave me a stern talking to about "waiting around for h". Imploring me to move on.... "And if h comes around and realizes what he is missing, then I can worry about it then." Until then, there is no use wasting my time worrying about someone who doesn't want to be with me. Yep, I totally get it... And isn't this was DBing is all about? This is why gal is so important and refocusing my energies on myself. Ahhhh- got to get through this. I will be ok- I am ok.

Ok- enough jabbering. Have a good one!