I have been contemplating my sit. WW goes about as if things are fine. She told me that I should just go back to the way I was before her A; speaks to A as if it was in the past (she is implying that I should just not care about her like I did before.. that's her perception and I see how she thinks that.. but how can I? I am not that guy.. I changed and that change is for me!
For awhile now I have been thinking of my boundary; something that would help me detach; and that is split our living finances. My thought is why should I support a WW who is capable of supporting herself?
Last night W makes a comment about taking the car to fill gas (Costco on her way to work) and my response was it has enough gas. She quickly replies she can’t drive it anymore (that I won’t let her). I respond, you took the car last week to work, filled it with gas (thanks for doing but on my CC that you are refusing to help pay), went to dinner with your “high school classmates”, then drove OM home; and spent time there alone. Why should I let you drive the car (that she haven’t put a dime towards)?
She tells me to take her off the car registration. So I tell her that’s fine. But we need to look at other things too like CC (because my thought is she uses CC but doesn’t help pay the bill). She reacts and gets the CC whips it at me, I pick it off the floor and place on kitchen counter, she comes over and says I will help you and starts to cut the CC with scissors.
WW pissed! Later that night, she explains how she put her career on hold to be the safe/secure one in the family allowing me to take risk and progress professionally. How she was my support when I lost my jobs during bad economy. This is all true and I cannot deny it but that was not what she portrayed years ago.. it was that she did not want to move jobs that she was comfortable at her job.. I have tried to spark the interest for her to purse her career goal; but she would always give an excuse why she did not want to change and those excuses were because she was comfortable. So again, WW sees things differently and making it know that I was not there for her... and now "I am sticking it" to her.. this is a no win situation.. I can't even detach cleanly.
