She Wants Me to Leave 3rd Time .....EA or not EA?

[isittoolate]

Update and journal :

Tuesday was uneventful until 9:30 pm when W took a phone all from her 'friend' . She was sitting next to me as we settled down to watch TV. I knew it was him . She said hello stranger like she hadn't spoken to him for a while, but he knew about her Father being in hospital and asked about him - he's been in hospital for one week.

Anyway I got a little pissed as W paused the TV to take his call and seemed in no rush to finish the call. I went off to make a cup of tea came back and I unpaused the TV. She huffed as she was now missing some of the TV show and finished the call saying ' got to go, I'll ring you tomorrow'

Is it an EA? f*ck knows! She thinks it's a perfectly normal friendship. Later that night he liked and commented on one of MY FB posts re: the idiocy of Donald Trump. Then the next night he is posting about how grateful he is for his partner - he worked a 13 hour day and she made his dinner and ran a bath for him. My W liked his post.

Don't know what to think but I know how it makes me FEEL! Vulnerable and jealous and angry and resentful. I did a good job of not blowing up. But I didn't sleep well.

Wednesday - another day - move on.

Not a lot happened except W usually drops S8 at his Cubs activity hut and goes for a run with another mom. The other mom couldn't go. W told me and looked a little crestfallen - she doesn't like to run alone in the dark - so I offered to run with her. She eagerly accepted and that's how we had our first activity together without the kids since BD. A 4.5 mile run. Not exactly a chance to flirt and chat but better than nothing. I have been a runner for 20 years, w has just started 2 months ago and I would love to go running with her more often.

Later W thanked me for going running with her. She was very pleased with herself as it was a long run for her. She FBed it and tagged me in the post. W is addicted to FB and getting Likes - sad but true.

Thursday am - W is up very early at 5:30 ( usually she is up at 6) and rings me in tears from her car at 7 am.
Yesterday she had news that FIL had a lung biopsy - both W and I know it's probably for lung cancer. He was a mining ventilation engineer for over 20 years but has never smoked.
W apperently was awake at 5 and rang me in tears at 7. She is surprised at her own emotions as for years she has resented her dad, and tolerated his ways - he's a stubborn old goat.
Also early in our M there were hints that he sexually abused W , she has memories but isn't sure if they are false memories. She has buried this history - and it is not spoken about. She might have spoken to a IC about it when she had post natal depression.

W was also feeling guilty - she has a huge guilt complex. She probably won't be able to visit him until Sunday because she has a big work Christmas party on Saturday night. Guilt guilt guilt.

Of course I validated and said his diagnosis and prognosis will not change over 2 days.

Anyway I am going to a work Xmas party tonight in the home of Shakespeare. An English pub and a Thai restaurant! Then tomorrow another night out with the lads from the cycling club, beer and an Indian curry!

I am then taking the boys to London to visit Winter Wonderland and the Tower of London - we are staying overnight. W will have a lot of stewing time, fretting over FIL and her guilt.