Hello , haven’t posted here in a while since it was becoming addictive logging every night and morning. It has been 3 months since my wife left with my daughters, I haven’t seen them since. The last time I communicated with my wife was over text 2 months and it was her asking me for a divorce. (pretty childish in my mind do it over txt) I have been patient all these months. I hired a L on 10/28 and all ppwk was submitted to start the process. After thanksgiving holidays everything was being delayed. Today I finally got a call and was informed the process server finally got the serving papers and my wife should be served by the end of the week. Unfortunately I have the court date until Jan 6 of 2016 , which [censored]!!! My lawyer said she would call my wife after she gets served in order to see if she agrees to an arrangement in order to have my girls for Christmas. I hope she does! I am waiting patiently again another month. I have gotten to a point in my life where I truly don’t miss her anymore. I love her and I wish we could work things out , but I DON’T NEED HER TO BE HAPPY. It’s weird but I am really starting to hate this woman , I never in my life would have imagine myself hating her , when I have always loved and cared for her. I have been happy alone at my house. I feels awesome forgetting to take out the trash and not getting yelled at. I am happy alone, something I was always fearful. I don’t know if the hate is normal? But I have prayed to God for it to go away. Work is keeping me busy and recently got a promotion so there is a positive. More than anything I miss my 2 daughters. I have missed so much time from them , I don’t know of any human being with no heart that would do that to a father. I know Christmas is going to be tough but I will get through it and in the end ill be standing. I still have hope I can save the marriage , weird thinkgin that when im starting to hate her?
I wouldn't let her keep the kids and just not see or talk to them. You have a right to see the girls, they are your children as well. Have you texted her and asked if you can come by and pick them up for a visit? Or, if you don't want to contact her, maybe set something up through a mutual friend, her parents, or someone you trust?
I don't think the hate is abnormal. I miss my H very much today. Other days I still miss him but not as much. And, there are still other days when I wonder why in the heck he thinks he has the right to destroy my life this way....and on those days, I am angry and hate him for what he's done. I have put up with his obsessive, paranoid crap for years and I would have stuck with him and reassured him, but he feels compelled to throw me away like I'm yesterday's trash. He has been downright cruel since he told me he wanted "space." It will forever be etched in my mind the sight of him rolling his eyes and sighing as he turned his head away from me every time I walked in his house so I could see him. He had no way to treat me that way. I think it's normal to go through different emotions from day to day as you begin to heal and live a life that you didn't plan on, or want to live that doesn't include them.
Anyway, I'm really sorry that you're missing your girls. I hope you get to see them soon!
M:45 H:48 M:11 No kids BD:Sept'15 EA:Confirmed 1wk later PA: Oct'15 12 '15 2 wk R Just kidding, H wants NC 12 '15 H back w/OW 4 '15 R &still working on it
Last time i txt her i told her " can i pickup my daughters on such date and return them on such hour, thanks, i didnt get a response. She doesnt want me to have them until a judge decides something because she thinks " i will steam the girls and keep them because there is no court order" that's an insult to me. Everytime i txt her she would say i was harassing her and scaring her. So i just stopped completely before she uses anything against me when it comes to going to court. I really hope my L can convince her after she gets served. That's my last hope if not i will have to keep waiting patiently like ive had until court date jan 6.
The hate gets stronger as weeks progress. I now rarely even look her up on facebook because i despite seeing her face. I just want to call her a "female dog" . But at the same time i want this to work out. weird ? Ive always been patient my entire life but this situation is really testing me and getting the best out of me. But again , it's awesome living alone. Today i forgot to take out the trash, and there was no problem what so ever
I remember your old thread. Wouldn't she be in danger of losing custody by depriving the children of seeing their father? This is so unhealthy for the children! She is not doing what is in their best interest.
I am sorry you are going through this. Your emotions are normal and you are entitled to them. Wishing you the best
Julie
Me: 42 H: 43 Twins age 5 Physically Separated 7/2015
Last time i txt her i told her " can i pickup my daughters on such date and return them on such hour, thanks, i didnt get a response. She doesnt want me to have them until a judge decides something because she thinks " i will steam the girls and keep them because there is no court order" that's an insult to me. Everytime i txt her she would say i was harassing her and scaring her. So i just stopped completely before she uses anything against me when it comes to going to court. I really hope my L can convince her after she gets served. That's my last hope if not i will have to keep waiting patiently like ive had until court date jan 6.
The hate gets stronger as weeks progress. I now rarely even look her up on facebook because i despite seeing her face. I just want to call her a "female dog" . But at the same time i want this to work out. weird ? Ive always been patient my entire life but this situation is really testing me and getting the best out of me. But again , it's awesome living alone. Today i forgot to take out the trash, and there was no problem what so ever
So - she herself is doing exactly what she says she is afraid that you would do - keeping the kids since there is no court order. That's bizarre.
Have you asked her how come she thinks it is okay for her to do this, while stating it would be wrong for you to do it?
M 16 yrs, WH62, P54 3 adult blended kids EA 11/13, BD1 6/14 PA fall 14, BD2 2/15 Piecing 2015, BD3 12/15 Separated 4/16 WH moved OW in 5/16 Divorced 6/15/17
So there is a little thing that is bugging me. My google calendars are synced with her google account. I notice she marked the date 12/12 as her exbf birthday who she has been talking to since she left me. I kind of want to tell her to "please take me off your calendar as i dont want to know when it's his birthday, ive been dealing with this guy for 5 years and i am done with hearing or knowing about him. thanks. Should i send it ?
