My own personal gratitude list also included some of the same things as yours. What's sad is that we didn't actually *ask* for those things while we were married. I know I was hauling around a load of society-laden guilt, living in a world cloaked by the nasty word, "should". I stuck to the martyrdom complex pretty tightly, and found it completely liberating to admit that I was human and needed those things too.
BTW, I'm an extrovert, and my job requires interaction with people. I love that part of my job. But when I come home, I become an introvert. In order to stay energized outside the home, I need serious battery recharging by unplugging from the world when I have downtime. I'm not at all unhappy about that discovery, and I refuse to feel guilty for needing those things to stay balanced.
What I find interesting is that my XH became a serious extrovert after he left. He's got the same tendencies as I do, but he overrides them to assuage his loneliness. I was always the one pestering him to go out with me and do things. And now I've become the hermit. Weird.
I hope you can connect the dots here. Now you know your needs, and it's really important to make sure that YOU meet them. Others can't read our minds, so we must learn how to speak up lovingly.
You go, girl!
Hugs, Betsey
"There are only 2 ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
