Back on these forums again 3

[Mona52]

I was able to get a few things done. I was cruisin along nicely. I walked the dog and we had a blast, I came home and played with her toy for a while. I did not cook her dinner, I had no time. I went to the grocery store and bought a ton of fruits and veggies, lean meats, whole grains and low fat dairy.

I celebrated by making a huge pot of chili which not one of my kids ate because there are beans in it... It was so yummy, i think their tongues are broken.

I dealt with a stressful night with my mom and my sister. I felt an inch tall during the exchange. But help came from the weirdest place.

My sister married the perfect man for me. Everyone who sees both of us agrees that we married the wrong people. We are 2 peas in a pod when we are near each other.

Last time I was DB'ing, he was my rock. I love him to death, and I know he feels the same about me. We have never even come close to crossing any kind of line. I stay as far away from this man as humanly possible. I never text him or go anywhere near their house. I may not speak to my sis because she burglarized me, but I would never seek revenge that way.

I was wallowing in despair late last night. I was not able to get any down time, no rest and relaxation. So when it was time to finally close my eyes, the issue with my mom and my sis made the issue with my H and M seem more hopeless because my PMA was pretty low.

All of a sudden I get a text message. With a few words my sis's H was able to lift me right back on my feet again. They were not even great words full of meaning and inspiration, nope, it was a normal, silly conversation.

I know why, and I had forgotten how he has this magic power. When he talks to me, I can see myself through his eyes. He sees me as this kind of superwoman. He has good reason to, my sis is crazy and I have done impossible things to help that family out over the years.

When he speaks to me, I feel competent, strong, happy. Because he sees that, no matter what I actually feel at the time. When other people give me a compliment, I feel like a fake. Like, if they only knew how pathetic I really am, they would never say what they said. But he does not ever compliment me. He states facts that shows me what he sees when he looks at me.

I used to get that from my H as well, but never the same as with my BIL.

The weird part is we never, ever text. Yet out of the blue last night he sends me a text. I dont care why. I just know I woke up today feeling more stable than I have in weeks. Which is a good thing because Christmas is coming, and I have to really start to prepare for that mental ball of pain.

I wish everyone on this board could all just get together on Christmas, because there is no way around it, it is hard.