First off, do not tell her you found her journal. Second of all, plan to go to anything that involves your daughter. Do not hold back on account that your W will be there. It doesn't bother your W. however, it hurts you and your daughter. Thirdly, only pay for the things that could come back and rob you.......for example, her insurance of any kind (while legally married). Otherwise, don't give her financial support to live apart from you and indulge in this A with OM. Fourthly, ultimatums do not work. However, boundaries do work, if you study the difference in boundaries and ultimatums. There is a link that explains it more. Fifth........protect yourself financially, where she has no access to your accounts, credit cards, debit cards, etc.
A woman in MLC and a wayward wife in an A, have very similar behaviors and it is often difficult to know for sure. One thing that is for sure is this is not the girl you married! She thinks differently, talks differently, and behaves differently.
I think she gave a hint in her journal as to her unhappiness. She obviously was struggling with something. By struggling, I mean she was searching for something to fill a void. It can cause a woman to become vulnerable to con artists, especially, when he pretends she's the greatest thing since candy.
One reason she appeared to be able to walk away from the home where she raised her children and had years of loving memories, is b/c she was closing that chapter in her life and starting with a brand new adventure......IMHO.
Yes, the narsistic side is usually shocking to her family and friends. It is not unusually at all, to see them cast aside lifelong friends and even family members who do not support their new life style.
What, exactly, are you doing that you call a 180?
I am glad to see you GAL. That is great! Keep it up. This may be turn into a long time before your W comes to her senses. You basically need to do what she said and don't wait on her. Enjoy your life as best you can. Leave her alone to deal with the consequences of her decisions. It may take the con artist doing a number on her, before she gets her eyes open. And the crazy part? There are no guarantees that she will move back home, even if he dumps her and takes everything she has. B/c the OM is not her main problem. He's just the visible one. Her main problem is her mindset. Right now, she sees him as her answer to a second chance at happiness and love. When she sees him for what he is......if she ever does......who knows if she'll go searching on FB for OM#2?
Sadly, this seems to be a serious outbreak in our society today. As you read the stories here, you will see how similar they all sound.
It is not about what you feel should work in your M. It is about doing the work that gets the right results. Do what works!
