Pho, glad your 180 worked at the holiday party. One thing you forgot to mention - how did it make you feel? More than trying to get you H to notice, did it feel different to mingle? Did you enjoy yourself more? The reason I'm asking is that as we make changes it's important to evaluate which ones will be permanent.

Also, please don't ever think no one cares about you in this world. I've never met you and we only interact peripherally, but your story resonates with me and I find inspiration in your posts.

Now about those chest pains/anxiety - what specifically is the trigger? Anything you can do to lesson that anxiety? I'm asking partially out of a need to find a solution for myself. Yesterday was a mess and I think my body tried to shut down a couple times during anxiety attacks on the couch with my family....

Me-38 W-38; T-15 M-12;
S10 and S6
BD - July 2016; EA confirmed; confronted Aug 2015
EA dissolved 12/2016

Never make someone a priority when all you are to them is an option - Maya Angelou