He told me that one of the reasons he does not want to reconcile with me is because I wouldn't throw my D out after he left. I know I have been over indulgent with both of my kids over the years. I parented from guilt because their father completely walked away from them 7 years ago and abandoned them. My S hates his dad and wanted nothing to do with him. My D was a daddy's girl and it hurt her incredibly when he stopped all contact. I guess at times I over compensated.
I'm also a conflict avoider. I hated fighting with the kids or my H or anyone else in my family. I would just hunker down and do things myself if no one else stepped up. Until I got sick and then I just couldn't do anything for anyone. My H got mad at me because I wouldn't make the kids do more stuff. I just didn't have the energy to yell or demand. I just made it to work and then bed. Then I couldn't even make it to work. My H didn't step up either. His reasoning was if I didn't make the kids do anything then he didn't have to do anything either.
Just writing this makes me shake my head. He is a grown adult. How selfish. In fact he is one of the most selfish persons I have ever met in my life. Why? Why do I want to be with someone that is like this?
Ok got side tracked....my H said that he wants me to be the strong woman he met and was attracted to. To make the tough decisions (like kicking out my daughter. But what he doesn't understand is that I am working on becoming strong again and the first strong thing I will do is cut out the person that caused me pain (emotionally and financially) and that person is him.
Di-mond in the rough M-45 H-38 My children S-25 D-23 T 5 M 4 H left April Fools Day 2015
