Need Help (new thread)

[AU Bob]

Well, it's my 50th birthday today, and I'm feeling good about it.
I'm in a bit of a transitional stage at the present, I still want to reconcile, but I am in two minds. One, I want it, and two I should just move on, it's been 7 months now, and I know some of you here have been working on R for years, I really admire the faith, hope and fortitude you guys have.
Got a happy birthday text from WW, WAW, and my feelings about it are mixed, I just replied "Thanks" and said no more.
I,m really tired with the uncertainty of it all, not knowing what to do all the time, worrying about making mistakes, and the hassle's with the family dynamics, It' very tiresome.
We have Christmas coming up and I want to give her a card at least, I don't hate her, I still have feelings for her, but it is not as a wife at this point, it' almost like I don't know her anymore but I would like to be with her, if that make sense, any ideas what I should write in the card?.
I don't speak to her much, I have withdrawn from contact as much as I can, I'm in two minds about this as well, should I try to talk to her,( she doesn't really contact me about anything)or just stay away?