Basically I see that you are just in the same position I am. LOST!!!
It's just amazing how our stories unfolded the same way. With these idiots saying how great we are and that they still love us and regret all what they did and are doing to us.
They also say how unhappy their decision is making them and they always show themselves miserable.
But and this is a huge BUT, they do not see their way back into the marriage, and they talk to us about this.
What to do??? I am very curious to know what our friends have to say and try to follow some advice because I find myself in the same boat right now. It's painful, it hurts all the time.
It is not the same pain anymore, it is almost like being on a funeral of someone you love dearly. I don't know if this is the last step to let go. It may be that it is an intense pain because the next move is to just give up on all of this.
RD, hang in there, I am sure that there is a better purpose for our lives, for us to be in this board, even for the people that are helping us to get out of this mess to be the ones that show. I do not believe in coincidences, but rather believe it is meant to be, it is our path.
I get the whole thing about being grateful, we have it all, it is great and we should be thankful because we got our houses, kids, we have a job, we are not in harms way and blah, blah, blah. But we also have the constant presence of the other one, reminding us of that deep pain of rejection, abandonment.
And we have TEENAGERS at home, with their own natural turmoil, building their future right now. We need to be strong and be there for it all, whatever comes we need to be calm and supportive.
So, we are in a million pieces. We need to be strong and wake up every day to keep the money flowing. Someone has old underwear and we need to put on a good attitude and smile and go shopping.
We can't just get drunk and be irresponsible, cry our lungs out and break some plates against the wall.
We can't even die, it would be so unfair with our little ones.
So what to do??? Maybe we need to just be selfish and decide on some serious boundaries and THE HELL WITH YOU attitude. You made the bed then now sleep on it kind of thing.
I did not feel angry most of the time, but I am somewhat developing anger. I am angry that I need to carry the heavy weight and my X is just figuring out his life.
Let's wait for some smart folks to give us direction, some ideas that will help us to move forward. For now, I actually feel good we are in the same situation. Somehow I feel that in the middle of all this disgrace we are finding that life is indeed beautiful and we will get to the other side soon enough.
You will see RD, just give a little more time to all this to be unfold in a better situation. I think that what is painful now is that we are this kind of people that will hold on to our values and have a hard time to just let it go. And we know that once we do, it is very hard to go back. Although we love our Xs we deep inside know that we are very, very close to our moment of 'I HAD ENOUGH".
Well, let's see what advice we get and move on from there.
On a private note: I also care about you a lot RD, I even think that we are getting a little mixed up because we did develop some flirting. We see hope and in the same time it is something so vague and abstract. Not even saying kind of impossible with our million kids. Why are we both in these crazy ride? I don't know anymore. My friends think that I went nuts for real now. When I look back into my life journey, I can't even believe I find myself here. I tough the crazy was out, and yet it is even more crazy right now.
At least we can laugh at ourselves today, we find ourselves in a big mess but we can find comfort in each other.
I am just perplexed and amazed of how life keeps juggling with us, our hearts and feelings.
Love you with all my heart and who knows, maybe one day we can be broken together.
Have a good day RD, laugh, enjoy the pain, it is teaching us to be better.
Um abraco gostoso da Pink que te guarda no curacao.
