Time to let go ....How (4)

[otw]

OK here we go now that the holiday is over and I am caught up...Prob be a long one.

So, last i left off I was scheduled to have them for thanksgiving, but was letting her take the kids for a few hours to visit with. I had my sister and her family coming over to my house along with my mother for the day. W picked up kids in the late morning after i told her i need them back by a certain time. I took care of the house and yard while they were gone then got cleaned up.
I was scheduled to pick the kids up at W house. I have never been there before and i knew her mother, brother and a few of her family would be there. Kind of stressed about it, but nothing too much.
I made sure i looked my best heading over there. Got there and the kids wanted me to come in and see their rooms which i did. W mother gave me a big hug and was very happy to see me. Told me how great I look. her brother was saying the same. Made some small talk and joked around with the acting really happy. W looked a little down but not much. Grabbed kids and left.
Got home and the kids played with their cousins and had a blast. Dinner was good and we all enjoyed ourselves. We all crashed that night as we had a long day.
We planned on hitting one of my favorite parks that is on a huge river with sister and cousins. The kids had a blast and we had all of them climb a tree there and got some great group pictures we will use to give the grandparents for xmas.

WE all ate lunch then it was time to drop off the kids with W. The kids have not been taking the switch to her well. W is beginning to buy them a lot of things. I know it is because they dont think her place is fun so it is warranted but i feel she is trying to buy some love. She used to yell at me for buying too much stuff for them.

I met up with a group of guys I played rugby with for many years that evening. They all brought wives and kids as well, and i was the only solo one. It wasnt that bad and i had a blast. Prob stayed out too late after but was a good time.
I picked up kids early next morning to go cut down a tree with the rest of my family. Took kids home to play with cousins a little more then dropped back to W.

Spent the rest of the day cleaning up and relaxing. Took care of groceries, etc..Got up Sunday and went golfing with my group. Hadnt done that in a while. was very fun. Picked up kids afterwards and took them for lunch and play time at one of their favorite places. W was scheduled to come by in the evening to go through xmas decorations and split them up. I really was not looking forward to this, but told her i was cooking and she was welcome to stay and eat with the kids. She came over and I could tell she spent plenty of time getting ready to come over. I did take some good looks at her and She started looking a little old to me, or the fact that she maybe have the situation catching up to her a bit.

So we had to go through everything and split up. I actually probably let her take more than my share, but it is no big deal to me. I just wanted to make sure i got my share of the things the kids made or their stuff. Then we had to split the family items and the items that were just her and i type stuff.

I asked her if she even wanted any of them. She responded yes. This one was tough and i think it got to both of us. We finished up and ate then she left. This was the most time we spent together since she left. All good interactions. Kids made a few comments about staying with her that she prob didnt like, but i ignored.
As she was leaving D7 came running up and asked if we kissed, and was telling us to kiss. W was already down the walk to the drive way and I was at the door so we both were able to kind of brush it off. She is trying to play match maker i think!
Yesterday was back to the grind of school and work. Kids and I started decorating and made a list of things we need to buy to make up for what W took.

For me, well the holiday and the interactions with W made me miss her quite a bit. I realized i need to start taking down some pictures in the house of her and replace. I think it is time to just start one at a time. I have been doing plenty for myself and staying busy. I dont find myself obsessing over her but to say i am detached is foolish. I still really love her and still have hope. I have been trying to take note of all the small things that are positive and not dwell on the things i dont like.
I guess that is all for now, so overall great few days, good interactions with W and feel good on my own as well.
As I keep saying, Keep moving.